mom: can you do this chore for me?
me: *doesn't do it within 0.2 seconds*
mom: *does it for you*
mom: why can't you ever be responsible

Military community of tumblr:

I have a but of a dilemma on my hands-

Join the Army as a 68W or join the Navy and hope against hope that my recruiters can get me HM (hospital corpsman) before I ship. I am more interested in the Navy for travel opportunities but it seems like the Army can offer me the job I want right away (even if they told me my chances of ever earning the title of “combat medic” are very slim as a woman). Now what do I do?

parnela-lansbury:

kenezbian:

soulmate AU where you wake up on your 18th birthday with the first words your soulmate will say to you tattooed on your body so you’ll know them when you meet them

image

admittedly, there are a few bugs in the system

germanystuck:

the worst feeling is when one of your friends brings up a kink that you kinda like but then they’re like “IDK WHY PEOPLE LIKE THAT SORT OF THING THAT’S WEIRD” and you just (sweats quietly)

I had a friend who was into some very kinky things and people would always talk to me about it like “omg so weird and crazy!!” But little did they know… We have the same kinks

(Source: ludbeilschmidt)

waeh-edsheeran:

one time when my grandma was young she was at a party and a guy asked her to dance with him

she said no because she thought he was ‘gross’ and ‘a loser’

that guy went on to be the lead singer of The Rolling Stones